The Voice for Insightful Leadership with Shelley Row, P.E.

Posts tagged "real wellness"

Do you worry about leaving town for vacation? Maybe you are concerned that things may not go smoothly while you’re gone. Or maybe the volume of email to which you’ll return feels over-whelming. Or maybe you feel that the customer may not wait, and you’ll lose business. I understand all those concerns. They were mine, too. But, guess what. I did it.

I took a two-week vacation (to Tibet with the Ra Ma Institute and traveled with my step-daughter, Linnea Miron, who is the CEO of Real Wellness); never touched my computer; didn’t respond to emails and (drum roll) the sky didn’t fall. It is possible to be out-of-touch and the world won’t come crashing down. It takes preparation.

Here are the four steps I took to prepare so that I had the space to relax and benefit from the trip.

1. Touched base with clients in advance. For any client who had a pending action item or an action that may be needed while I was gone, I contacted them in advance. I explained that I would be in Tibet with iffy wifi and cell coverage. No one panicked, most were pleased that I let them know and all were happy for me.

2. Completed activities in advance. I made an effort to complete tasks in advance that would be due while I was gone. For those items I was not able to complete, we scheduled meetings after I returned to discuss progress, schedule and due dates. Everything was easily worked out.

3. Staff monitored and responded to emails. My staff monitored my emails for any unanticipated issues or for client questions (from current or prospective clients). When appropriate, they let the client know that I was out of the country. If they couldn’t help directly, they worked with the person to schedule a call when I returned. Everyone felt that we were responsive to their requests.

4. Cleaned out the junk emails. This one is tricky. I opted to periodically delete junk emails when I had accessible wifi. I chose this so I wasn’t overwhelmed by the shear number of emails. There is something heart-stopping to see hundreds of emails stacked up after a two-week trip. The trick, of course, is to not get sucked into work. It was effective for me because I scanned email subject lines and the sender. I didn’t open or read anything. It was obvious when emails were junk and were safely deleted. When I returned, there was a manageable number of emails that needed “real” consideration and response.

These four steps worked for me. The preparation was not to be taken lightly. The weeks leading up to my trip were busy, but the payoff was high. (More about that in the next newsletter.) There were many other professional men and women on the trip. All the ones I spoke to did some combination of these techniques so that they, too, had the mental and emotional space to absorb the wonders of the Tibet.

What can you do to prepare so that you reap the full benefits of creative down time?



I admit up front that I’m not good at recognizing the nuances of people. That’s why I want to share this tip with you. It helps me and it’s likely to be valuable to you, too.

My step-daughter, Linnea Miron, is the CEO of Real Wellness.  She and I talked about the challenges of truly understanding people – whether staff, clients, or partners – so that we more effectively work together. But the brain is designed to see the world from our perspective. It takes effort and energy to consider another’s viewpoint. She shared that her husband, Ricky Williams, when working with a client, uses a simple technique to coax his brain to shift perspective. With each person, he asks himself, “Who’s here?”

Think about the simple power in that question. Try it yourself. With each person you work with, divide “Who’s here?” into four parts.

    1. What do you know about their life at this moment? This question helps you become more resonate with and sensitive to the factors influencing their thinking and behavior. For example, tomorrow I’ll see my friend, Page, for the first time since she visited her son at college. Their visit is likely to have left her heart full. That’s a good place to start. Maybe the person you talk with has recently changed jobs, has a new (awful) boss, gotten a promotion, was out with a sick baby, is leading a high-profile project, has a daughter leaving for college, just lost her beloved pet. Take a moment to ask yourself, “Who’s here and what’s happening in his life right now.” It shows your interest and creates connection which generates trust.
    2. What do you know about their personality? This is a key question that, when brought into your consciousness pays off in a big way. Think about it. What do you know about his communication style? Her work styles or nature? Maybe he is a big picture thinker, or maybe he loves knowing the details. Maybe she has a healthy ego or struggles with self-esteem. Maybe he takes pride in his work, is highly sensitive, is the life-of-the-party, is practical, or is a deep thinker. The list goes on. Here’s the dilemma, your brain wants him or her to be like YOU! But they aren’t. The more you appreciate who’s really here, the more you are likely to adapt your style and align the jobs with their skills.
    3. What do you know about their interests? This one may be easier for you. What are his hobbies? How does she spend her time? Perhaps he has a New England Patriots poster in his office, or a photo of a sailboat. Is there a Food and Wine magazine in her bag? Knowing something about her interests can provide a foothold for an easy conversation starter. Who’s here and what does he enjoy?
    4. What do you know about their background? The more you know about a person’s background the better you understand the filters through which she sees the world. Awareness of background influences provides insight into reactions, interpretations and pre-conceived ideas. For example, growing up in a small Texas town surrounded by farms, I struggle to understand the pressures of city dwellers just as they may struggle to understand the tragedy of drought. Who’s here? What’s their background and how does it influence their behavior?

Try exploring the power in, “Who’s here?” It gets you out of the way so that you can truly see the person right in front of you for who they are. I’ll be curious to know how it works for you!