The Voice for Insightful Leadership with Shelley Row, P.E.

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Insightful Leaders Coaching Programs

Your work situation is unique. Your challenges are yours and yours alone. Your career is your responsibility to manage. As good as group workshops and books are, you know that you’d benefit from individual coaching.  After all, you get coaching for golf, tennis, math, music, Excel, Java and more.

Most people hope for success but rarely invest in themselves to make it a reality. If you are not “most people” and are serious about your personal and professional growth invest in one of the Insightful Leaders Coaching Programs.

Whichever program you choose is tailored and personalized to meet your goals. Plus, each program includes a DNA Behavior self-assessment in either the concise or complete form. Between the assessment and coaching with Shelley, you will walk away with new insights to grow your leadership abilities and make your best choices.

In your coaching program, your goal may be to:

  • Enhance your ability to collaborate even with those who frustrate you.
  • Better communicate through constructive face-to-face meetings or presentations.
  • Improve complex decision-making so that you stop over-thinking.
  • Self-manage more effectively to reduce reactivity and stress.
  • Gain confidence to better represent your views and make choices that serve you well.
  • Understand and maximize the value you bring to your work.
  • Position yourself for the next career move.

Here are three Insightful Leaders coaching options.

Insightful Leaders Individual Coaching Program

The Insightful Leaders Individual Coaching Program is designed for maximum benefit and value. It includes six-months of unlimited coaching with Shelley. It is tailored around your identified goals and includes the complete version of the Business DNA Self-Assessment. $1497 

Micro Insights Coaching Program (link paper)

The Micro Insights Coaching Program is fast, simple, impactful and designed to fit into your busy work life. It includes the concise Communication DNA Self-Assessment and a targeted coaching session with Shelley. $297

Insightful Team Coaching

The Insightful Team Coaching is designed specifically for each team that Shelley works with. It includes a DNA Behavior Self-Assessment for each team member.  Contact Shelley directly to discuss this option and design a program to meet your team’s needs.

Have you ever found something that you like and just stick with it? Maybe it’s your favorite restaurant, favorite running shoe, favorite hand lotion or…in this case, your favorite clam chowder. Recently, we visited friends in Florida and a discussion ensued about the best clam chowder. The next day, we had a side-by-side taste test with two clam chowders. There was the old favorite and a new un-tried contender. I’ll leave you in suspense about the winner as we ponder the relevance to insightful leadership.

At work, we also have our favorites– a favorite process, a favorite go-to staff person who always gets the job done, a favorite approach to problem solving. They are our favorites for a reason – they worked well in the past, we are familiar with them, they don’t require excessive thought, or they are reliable. Like the favorite clam chowder – we know what we’re getting. We get what we’ve always gotten, and the brain likes it that way. It takes less energy for the brain to do what it’s always done.

But, you lead in a fast-moving environment where little is stable. Can you afford to settle for the standby, comfortable solutions? What if there’s a new way and you didn’t discover it? How do you entice people to look beyond their favorites and uncover the creative approach? Here are two simple questions that help push you and others to look beyond the obvious.

Ask, “What if we can’t do it this way – what’s another way?” Let’s say you’re working on a sensitive project and all recommendations take the tried-and-true approach. Push yourself and your team out of the comfort zone by posing this question. “Let’s pretend that our regular approach isn’t available to us. What else can we do?” With that question, you force the discussion to become more creative immediately. When you take the favored approach out of contention and require consideration of other options, you force the brain to dig in and do the hard work of real thinking. Expect to meet resistance. Don’t settle for the default option. Continue to take options off the table to force thinking at a deeper level.

Ask, “Why are we doing it this way?” Listen carefully to the responses. Perhaps you hear, “That’s what we did the last time,” or “It worked for us before,” or “It’s the standard approach.” All responses are of the same ilk…they are reliant on the default behavior. Don’t stop probing until you get to the bottom line goal.  Take the clam chowder example. Why do we always choose this particular clam chowder? The answers could be: It’s at the restaurant on the way home from work; it has a top reputation; we’ve been eating it for years. Good to know but the objective was not to find the most convenient clam chowder with the best reputation. When you uncover the reason for selecting the tried and true, it can open the door to other choices and reveal options to explore.

As for our clam chowder taste test…the old standby won in a landslide. That could happen to you, too. If it does, don’t be lulled into thinking there’s no reason to probe in the future. Change is constant and those who keep up the questions and see beyond the obvious will be the first to find the next favorite thing.

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Best Audience: Association staff or boards, association chapter executives and their elected leaders, organizational teams, mid or upper management staff, new executives who want to fast-track their understanding of staff talent

insightful teamwork - keynotes & workshops with Shelley Row

Boost your team’s performance ….NOW! This timely and relevant professional development program will share the characteristics and traits top team members possess.  Specifically, everyone will take a self-assessment using the specialized DNA Behavior Self-Assessment tool (abbreviated or full version). The assessment transforms human-based behaviors into a science-based approach that is easy to understand and apply. For new leaders and managers, this program will save time and frustration in learning the skills and characteristics of staff. The workshop uses insights from neuroscience to create practical actions for enhancing teamwork.

This professional development program results in tangible steps to aid teams to enhance individual strengths and adapt to differences. As a result, complex work is accomplished effectively and with less drama. Team members learn to work with their natural behavior style and that of teammates. Divergent opinions will not bog down progress and those with similar opinions won’t skew results.

Learning objectives:

  • Discover your natural behavior style and preferred work environment.
  • Learn how your strengths benefit the organization and where they can torpedo effectiveness.
  • Recognize and leverage the differences between you and your team members for improved communication and reduced tension.
  • Uncover and overcome team blind spots.
  • Leverage natural decision styles to optimize complimentary views

Have you ever wanted to try something new in your organization but were hesitant to start?  Maybe it’s a process that you need to change or a technology you’re considering investing in.  It can feel risky and uncertain. You don’t want to break anything. And, that causes you to delay jumping in.

Recently, I was in Vienna, Austria.  As my friend and I strolled though the Christmas markets near the Rathaus (City Hall), we noticed people ice skating. But it wasn’t on an ice rink. It was an ice path that meandered through the trees in the park. It was beautiful and unlike anything I’d seen before.  “I’d like to try that,” I thought to myself, “but what if I fell and twisted an ankle or broke a leg or dislocated a shoulder?” A big part of my business is traveling to organizations for consulting, speaking or training. A broken/dislocated anything would be bad for business.  Hmmm…do I take the risk and try it?

Later, skating through the trees, I reflected on the thought process that helped me move forward and how to apply it in business.

  1. Make a financial commitment. If you’re serious, you must buy in at some level – with your cash or your time. Buying a ticket, renting skates and a locker wasn’t the same as purchasing software or hardware but it was enough to cause me to evaluate how badly I wanted to ice skate. In business, “free” can be too easy….to easy to not follow through. You have no stake in the new venture to motivate your behavior.  Commit and get going.
  2. Take small steps and increase confidence. It had been years (a lot of years) since I ice skated. I laced the skates with trepidation. The voice in my head said, “Have you lost your mind? You’re 57; you haven’t skated in ages; you weren’t a whiz at it; and you could jeopardize your work. This can’t be a good idea.” Take one step at a time with increasing confidence. Lace up the skates; walk slowly on the decking outside the icy pathway; step onto the ice and hold the rails; slowly gain confidence to haltingly move forward. You can do the same in your organization. Start with a limited effort –a small project, a handful of customers. Pay attention along the way and assess progress. Gradually, do more, go faster, implement farther into the organization as your confidence grows and results surface.
  3. Grow skill. In my experience in working with other organizations, the hardest part of doing something new is having the discipline to keep up the new activity. It’s far easier to revert back and do what has always been done. As you innovate, keep the faith. Now is the time to observe others who have more practice, actively assess progress, and keep trying. It helps to acknowledge small gains and discuss the experience with others on your team. That will assist them to maintain focus and keep up the effort (and it takes effort to do something new). I watched the little kids glide past effortlessly. Slowly, I remembered how to gently push off with my skates and slowly…oh so slowly, propel myself around the iced pathway. After a few laps, my skill grew. It was still precarious, but I was out there making progress.
  4. Develop expertise. Once you’ve proven that the new approach (process, software or whatever is new in your organization) has value, start learning from the experts. Who has the best practice? What are they doing? How can you tweak your approach (while it is still pliable in the minds of staff) to position yourself to use this innovation to your best advantage?

In my skating example, I didn’t get to the stage of developing expertise.  That wasn’t the point. But I did successfully try a new activity in a way that managed risk.

You don’t have to go to Vienna or go ice skating to try something novel in your organization.  What would you like to put into place that’s innovative? Take a step back and find ways to step through the new implementation in a way the manages your risk. There’s no need to risk that broken leg.

Copyright: gdvcom / 123RF Stock Photo

bootsIt was the sixth shoe store we visited in Vienna, Austria. And still no shoes.  I wanted to buy a pair of boots as my old ones from Milan, Italy, fit so well. In and out of shoe stores we went. My traveling companion had the patience of Job. I looked at combat-style boots, knee-length heeled boots, punk-rocker studded booties and everything in between. At each store, the increasingly impatient salesperson asked, “What are you looking for exactly?” To which I replied, “I’m not sure but I’ll know it when I see it.”

Have you ever worked for an I’ll-know-it-when-I-see-it manager? Or are you an I’ll-know-it-when-I-see-it manager? I’ve worked for this type of manager and my staff might even say that I’ve been this type of manager (although I’d like to think it was rare). Here are the pitfalls to this management style:

It’s frustrating for everyone around you. They, like the salesperson, are doing their best to assist in your quest. But no matter what they provide – a report, a product, a marketing plan, or a strategy – it’s not what you were looking for. It doesn’t take long for them to become exasperated and demotivated.

It’s a time waster. As the frustration grows, so does time. Time is spent guessing at the goal and producing a product to meet their best-guess.  While time spirals into more time, the cost also includes lost opportunity costs.  Just think about all the other work they could be doing that would result in a productive output rather than a guessing game.

You won’t know it when you see it.  Despite the belief that you’ll have an “aha” moment when you see that mysterious just-right thing, you won’t. You won’t know-it-when-you-see-it because you don’t know what you’re looking for. It’s a futile circular loop that rarely plays out well.

Everyone, including your organization, is better off if you replace I’ll-know-it-when-I-see-it with clarity of vision and direction. Here are three tasks to get you started.

  1. Clarify your objective. In my case, I needed to define my shoe objective. Did I want comfy, go-to-the-grocery-store booties, sophisticated stand-on-the-stage boots, or an edgy silver-studded pair? What did I want to accomplish with the boot search? Similarly, what are you trying to accomplish with your task? Do you know? Challenge yourself to define the goal and articulate it specifically. Ask yourself, “What does success look like?” What behavior will you see; what product will be available; what service experience will be created?
  2. Do your research. Poke, prod, search, explore, ask others, and research what’s out there. Now is the time to research options. Who else is in the ecosystem? What are their products or services? What is the state of the art or state of the practice? Seek out information to give you the boundaries of what currently exists so that you have a knowledgeable frame of reference to share with others.
  3. Define the parameters. In my case, I finally narrowed the search to black booties with a low heel and below a specific price point. That helped. What are your boundaries?  Think about your task and define the boundaries between acceptable and unacceptable. Communicate that dividing line clearly to reduce the frustration of those working on the task. Define the box within which your task fits to reduce the time and effort of others.

In the end, I didn’t buy shoes because no matter how many I looked at, I didn’t know what I was looking for. I didn’t know it when I saw it after all. Next time, I’ll be clearer and it will save me time and reduce the frustration of those around me.  You can do the same. Clarify your objective, do the research, and define the parameters. You, those around you and your organization will come out ahead.

 

Copyright: bushalex / 123RF Stock Photo

Do you remember what it was like to fold a paper airplane? You fold the corners in on an angle so that there is a pointy end; fold the sides down into wings and there it is. A sheet of paper transformed into an airplane. And it flew! Well,…mostly.

Now, unfold the airplane and what do you see? The paper no longer lays flat; it retains the creases. Then, using the same paper, fold a new airplane but with the pointy end on the other side. You’ll find that the creases work against you. The paper fights your efforts because it already has a shape and it wants to keep its original shape. That’s the dilemma with habits from the perspective of the brain.

Think of your office. What habits are embedded in the organization that are no longer serving the organization?  The habits will show up as processes, routines (formal or informal) and ways of doing business. The organization has folded its own paper airplane and the creases in the paper are pronounced. For example, a team I managed years ago, learned over the years to put every new roadway sign or pavement marking through a long, arduous process guaranteed to take years. The individual and organizational brain was folded into a specific paper airplane and the creases were deeply formed. If we were to introduce innovation in the process, we had to unfold the old airplane and refold a new plane on top of the old one. Just as with the paper, the brain resists new folds.  So, what’s an insightful manager to do? Think like a paper airplane.

Commit. To develop a new habit, commit to it.  Refold the paper airplane with conviction; otherwise, the paper defaults into the hold pattern. You must be clear and specific about the behavior you wish to see. Make it as easy as possible for their brains to take the new pathways because the brain prefers the old paths – just as the paper more easily falls into the original folds. In my example, the team talked at length about a new streamlined process: how it would look, what steps were included; what decisions would be made along the way. Commit to the new habit.

Focus. You can’t remake every habit so focus on a high impact one. Remaking a habit is hard work. It requires considerable brain energy to use new pathways. Consequently, you are more likely to be successful if you focus on one change at a time. This allows the brain to use all available energy to remember the new approach and choose it.

Repeat and reward. Creating new habits requires effort and repetition.  If you refold a paper airplane in a new way, you may run a fingernail along the new creases so that the paper more easily follows the new path. It’s the same for creating new habits with your staff. Reinforce, reward, and repeat the new habits over and over and over until you’re tired of hearing yourself talk it. Then you may be getting through. You, as the astute leader, must maintain the vision and constantly talk about the new approach.

So, go ahead. Grab a piece of paper and make a paper airplane. You know you want to!  As you do, think about a new habit that would benefit your organization. With each fold of the paper, consider the behavior do you want to see. Can you articulate it? How will you reinforce it every day for months and years? It takes commitment, focus, repetition and reward to bring about the new habit.  But once you have it – you’ll fly!

 

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It was a beautiful fall day in Keystone, Colorado. The aspen were gold and the sun highlighted the crevasses in the mountains that guarded the lake. It was a perfect time to rent a kayak and paddle around under the blue sky. My friend is an experienced kayaker. I am not.  But…how hard can it be? It’s a kayak.

Truthfully, it wasn’t hard to paddle around. It was just difficult to get to a specific point on the lake – just as it can be difficult to reach the goal that you set in your organization. Here are three points gleaned from paddling on a Colorado lake that can help you reach your organizational goals.

  1. Set a clear goal. “Let’s paddle to that grove of trees on the point,” my friend said. I replied, “Which grove of trees on which point?” It took discussion and lots of pointing to clarify which grove of trees on which point of land.  It’s the same in your organization.  The goal may seem crystal clear to you. It’s unlikely to be that clear to others. Talk about the goal with your staff and team. Engage them in discussion. What behavior will you all see when the goal is achieved? What specific outcome will be realized and how will you know?  This is the only way to ensure that everyone is working toward the same end.
  2. Adjust constantly. Off we went toward our grove of trees. But it wasn’t that easy. We negotiated how we would paddle together without knocking each other’s paddle. Plus, the light breeze blew the kayak away from the point of land.  We were constantly compensating for the breeze and an occasional boat wake. Similarly, how will your team work together and not get in each other’s way? It’s not that easy. Personality conflicts, incomplete communication and busy schedules get in the way of coordinated work. I’ve seen it first hand in my organization and in those organizations with whom I work. Busy staff don’t talk to co-workers – even briefly – to discover that they are doing the same work or that they are working at cross-purposes. It takes constant communication to make course corrections. In my office, each project had a detailed road map to guide the work. Even with the road map, it was essential that we read the “breeze” in the organization and adjust. As your work progresses, what do you know today that you didn’t know when you started? What course corrections are called for? Become an observer of the staff and their communication styles.  Who is working well together and who continues to paddle at cross-purposes? An adjustment in staff roles can better align natural communication styles for more productive work.
  3. Anticipate. As we paddled, it looked like we were on track – heading straight for the point – but with one extra paddle stroke, we’d gone too far. I didn’t anticipate the momentum of the kayak and adjust my paddling in time. It took more time and effort to reach the point. Are you reading the situation and anticipating the next steps? Every office has momentum – work flows that are set in motion, processes that are half completed. You must anticipate where the momentum takes you and adjust in advance before the need is obvious. This is the work of the insightful leader. Are you a keen observer of the work flow, the patterns in the office and the external influences? It’s only then that you can anticipate the trajectory and course correct before others realize it’s needed.

We made it to the point – eventually. I learned that I have a lot to learn about kayaking. On the surface, it looks easy, but the art of kayaking takes skill and intentional thought. Providing wise leadership is the same. Data isn’t enough. You must be an astute observer of the people and work to stay on course.

 

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Some time ago, I spoke at and facilitated an Executive Leadership Program for a notable association.  The speakers were a who’s who in that industry–successful business people with a solid track record.  There were sessions on responding to RFPs, auditing and accounting, business operations, and profitability. At the end of the program, the participants met in groups and identified their top three take-aways from the day, which we recorded.  One item rose to the top of the list: Do the right thing and be nice. The group discussed that it was interesting that profitability wasn’t the first item on everyone’s list – indeed, it only came up once. But every group commented on being nice and just caring.

So, what does that look like at work?  It all comes down to behavior. If we are being nice and caring, what are we doing? Gleaning from the discussion and from my experience, there are three behaviors that communicate care.

Seek First to Understand. That’s from Stephen Covey’s classic, The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People. He teaches that listening is a key skill. To do that, seek first to truly understand the other person’s point of view. Listen…truly listen. What we now know from neuroscience, is that when we listen and validate the other person’s comment or emotional state, it calms them.  They feel heard, and that settles the nervous system. It’s not that hard. But, you do have to restrain your impulse to dive in with your point.  Listen first. State it back. Hear them.  It shows you care about their opinion.

Speak strongly and politely. Somewhere along the way we forgot that being strong and confident are not mutually exclusive with politeness.  We can be strong and nice.  In fact, some of the strongest people I worked with embodied quiet calmness.  Without defensiveness, they could listen, hear, evaluate and come to a reasoned conclusion. I’ve seen caustic situations diffused when a manager lets the negative energy from another slide by and comment with calm understanding.  Even performance problems can be addressed with strength, without giving in and while being polite. We forget sometimes that politeness goes a long way.

Be interested in more than just their work.  One of the leaders who spoke at the program told the group that every Friday in the middle of the day, he called his staff just to chat.  He intentionally did not talk about work but rather used that time to connect on a personal level. Connection was another key theme from the program. For those of us (like me, I confess) who derive pleasure from checking off accomplishments, we can forget the importance of connecting personally. And yet, we feel more committed and motivated when we feel that people at work care about more than work. All it takes is an honest inquiry – How are things with your kids?  Which college did your daughter select? What did you think about the game last night?

Yes, profitability is essential but what these future executives learned is that they can get to profitability when their staff understands that they just care. Let’s face it, it’s just not that hard to be nice.

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WhiskeyScotland is known for fine woolens, shortbread, the heather-covered moors and single malt Scottish whisky.  I’m not a single malt whisky drinker but as a visitor to Scotland for ten days, I decided to try two per day. Here’s what I discovered about tasting my way through Scotland and why it’s relevant to your team.

  • Each whisky is the result of its environment. I tasted whisky from the islands (Skye, Jura, etc.), from the Highlands and from Speyside regions.  The flavors were as different as the topography and environment. For example, ingredients for whisky from Skye are heated with peat which gives the distinctive smoky flavor like drinking a camp fire.  The severe cold in the Highlands impacts the flavor intensity. Additionally, the flavor varied by age from the 10, 15, and 25-year-old varieties. And so it is with your team. Each team member is a product of his/her environment –strengths, skills, and stressors are colored and formed from individual history, experience and environment. How aware are you of team members’ background and experiences? Are you accounting for that natural behavior when pairing skills with tasks – just as one would choose whisky appropriate for the meal.

 

  • Small dilutions made a big difference. It was quickly evident that some whisky was smooth and soft to drink; others were like drinking a razorblade. Staff at the Dalwhinnie distillery explained that a single drop of water could make an otherwise edgy whisky into a smooth-drinking dram. A single drop of water? Sure enough…one or two drops swirled into the glass changed the nature of the whisky and calmed the edginess. It’s not so different with your team. Each of us brings our own uniqueness in the form of skills and behaviors. Those skills and behaviors bring their own type of edginess. Good teaming requires that each person recognize when their behavior gets in the way. We can develop the skill to dilute our behavior just a tad and make a big difference in teaming abilities. For example, someone with a strong personality who learns to rein in their outspoken approach just a wee bit becomes a more welcome team member.  A person inclined to extensive collaboration who delays decisions can benefit from diluting that behavior so that he/she pushes themselves to a decision sooner.

The next time you work with your team, pause a moment to consider Scottish whisky.  How are your team members unique?  Are you able to appreciate them by understanding the environment that has shaped them? How can you coach them so that they learn to dilute pronounced behavior a drop? Even the smallest change can make a big impact for your team.

For me, the interesting part of tasting Scottish whisky was appreciating the differences. It’s the same for your team.  Appreciate the differences and use them for a stronger team.

 

Photo Copyright: karandaev / 123RF Stock Photo

InfotuitionOne-and-two-and-three-and-four… My dad sat next to me counting out the beats as I practiced the clarinet. Night after night he taught and I learned. I was good but was never going to be the next Bennie Goodman. Nonetheless, I read and play music and appreciate the true virtuosos. My life is enriched by my knowledge.

Today my work is in helping others discover how to use both cognition and intuition in complex decision-making when data alone is not enough. I call it infotuition – the intersection of business pragmatics with gut feel. Frequently I hear, “You can’t teach an intuitive business sense. You have to be born with it.” Au-contraire. I firmly believe you can enhance your infotuitive skill because I’ve done it. To be clear, I’m not talking about gazing into a crystal ball or reading tarot cards. Infotuition is accessing the wisdom stored in both the cognitive and intuitive part of your brain for use in a business environment.

Decisions that swim in uncertainty and ambiguity can’t be made by using the cognitive part of your brain alone. You must tap into gut feel. It’s real and it’s valuable. Like learning music or another skill, you must want to learn. Here are five tips.

1. Value it. You must place value in infotuition. Of 75 leaders I interviewed, 74 of them attest to the value of their intuition or gut feel. They learned from trial and error that the nagging feeling provided wisdom that warranted their attention. Neuroscience shows that we store information in parts of our brain that communicate through feeling. Further, your gut has the same neurotransmitters found in the brain. But the gut and the intuitive brain do not access language. Nagging feelings are their communication tools.

2. Apply yourself. Let’s say that you’re the analytical type (like me). You cultivated, developed and value logical, rational thought. The logical part of your brain is skilled and it feels good to use it. Great. Hold on to that information and balance it with intuitive wisdom. It’s as though you go to the gym and only exercised your left arm. It’s strong but the right arm is neglected. You must commit to exercising both the left and right arms. It’s the same with your brain – which is a muscle. If you apply yourself you can develop the intuitive part of your brain and use it in a skilled way. Neuroscience tells us that we develop new behaviors and skills through intentional focus. It’s called self-directed neuroplasticity.

3. Start early. The brain is plastic particularly early in life. That’s why it’s easier to learn new skills – like music – early in life. Start early in your career to engage in diverse activities that build a storehouse of experiences in your brain. And I don’t mean just work activities. Your brain draws on lessons from all aspects of life. Put yourself is positions where you must make decisions. Look for opportunities that allow you to take some risk. Then consider both fact and feeling as you decide. Notice the nagging voice and give it a name. Naming the feeling makes it more tangible and allows you to work with it. With each decision you develop experience…and your brain.

4. Start now. Okay, so you’re not early in your career. You can still cultivate infotuitive skills because the brain retains some plasticity throughout your life. It’s not too late! Plant reminders to prompt you to think, “What am I feeling about this issue? What’s bugging me about the decision?” Pay attention to your answers. Those prompts will surface additional information to inform your decision.

5. Practice. Whether early or late in your career, practice cultivates your infotuitive sense – your gut feel. You don’t have to find the time because you are always practicing every minute of every day. Are you practicing behaviors that serve you? Do you practice noticing the nagging feeling? Practice plus intentional focus will teach your brain new tricks. In time, infotuition will become a habit. It’s takes effort and, to end at the beginning, you have to want it.

Sure, some people have a knack for sensing the intricacies of a complex situation. They intuitively sense how others will respond and how a scenario will play out. They are the virtuosos. Just because they are virtuosos doesn’t mean you can’t develop your own skill to a new level of competence. My musical ability will never rival Shakira’s, but I learned enough to enjoy playing, appreciate the great artists and enrich my life. You can do the same with infotuition.