The Voice for Insightful Leadership with Shelley Row, P.E.

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It was a dark, stormy night. Rain was falling in buckets as we drove to Houston to pick up my sister at the airport for the holidays. The white lane lines were scarcely visible. We had a general outline of the road but were stressed because of the limited visibility.  Suddenly, the road lit up like the proverbial Christmas tree. The lane lines were raised reflective markers and they glowed through the dark rain like beacons. The road was clearly visible.  There was no question that we were on our path and our relief was palpable.

Your plans for 2019 are like the road. Perhaps you set your goals and they are completely clear in your mind. But how well have you communicated those goals to staff?  Even if you see clearly, your staff may not. They may be generally on the right road but without clarity, they can feel the stress of uncertainty and that wastes energy and time. When your goals are crystal clear, your staff is relieved of that uncertainty and can focus on execution. It’s like having the road to their goals lit up with reflective markers.  How do you bring that goal clarity into your workplace?

  1. Set clear goals. Your staff wants to know that you, as the leader, know the direction of the organization. If you haven’t already, take the time to consider your 2019 goals. It’s like picking the route you’ll travel this year just as we picked the road to Houston. When you think about 2019, what course are you on? What are your goals for the year? What are the major activities you intend to accomplish? Write them down now.
  2. Metrics. How will you know that you achieved the goals? I like to ask clients, “What does success look like?” This question is a great way to crystalize your expectations. Success may look like a revenue target, or a target for new clients, or specific behaviors for customer service. Once you know what success looks like, what are the metrics? Maybe it’s financial or maybe it’s that staff manage client calls in an efficient, friendly way. For each goal, write down the metrics or behaviors you associate with your goals.
  3. Share with staff repeatedly. You need goal clarity and so do your staff. Don’t underestimate the difficulty of assisting staff to internalize the same goals. This is a key job for you! You must share the goals and share them again and again, to embed them in long-term memory. Once is not enough. Neither is printing them on a poster and thinking you’re done. Repeated, specific goals, with metrics, are the reflective markers along the way that reduce stress and provide clarity. It’s key for staff to know, really know, the expectations for them and the organization. Clarity eliminates wasted energy on speculation and allows all that energy to be directed into performance.
  4. Report progress. Progress reports demonstrate that you are serious about the goals. Visible reporting of progress reinforces the goal and creates more clarity. It reassures staff that they remain on the right road and that their way forward is still lit with bright lights.
  5. Celebrate success. Divide the goal into chunks and have mini-celebrations along the way. I recently read Chip and Dan Heath’s book, The Power of Moments. They note the success of dividing a big goal into chunks that can be rewarded along the way. The brain likes rewards for meaningful progress. Completion of interim steps encourages one to tackle the next step. What intermediate milestones can you celebrate?

We arrived in Houston safely and with less stress due to the clear, lighted path. You can provide your staff with a clear, well-lit path by identifying your goals and clearly articulating them … regularly. When you do, you reduce their uncertainty and stress so that they can focus on performance. And that makes for a great 2019!



brain and heartHoliday shopping. Holiday cooking. Holiday travel plans. Holiday decorating. Holiday visitors. Holiday hubbub. It’s easy to get lost in the holiday this-and-that. In the midst of the holiday bustle, I challenge you to also reflect and plan but in a different way. Instead of cataloging accomplishments, reflect first on what you accomplished, then on how it felt as you worked toward those accomplishments. You might discover insights that impact your 2019 goals and how you work toward them.

For example, as I reviewed my 2018 accomplishments and considered my 2019 goals, I mused at how (or if) infotuition applies here. You’re thinking, “Infotuition?” Infotuition is the integration of thinking and feeling in leadership and life. Infotuition leads me to realize that it matters both what you do and how you feel as you do it.

Try this. Identify the goals you accomplished in 2018 of which you are most proud. You may want to separate them into work, personal, community and your spiritual life. Now, consider how you felt as you worked toward these goals. Be honest. Notice what the answers tell you. Here’s what I discovered.

Shelley’s 2018 work accomplishments: earned my Certified Speaking Professional™ designation, was named an Inc. magazine as a top 100 leadership speaker, created the Insightful Leadership brand, produced a new demo video, and engaged new clients.

As I worked toward these goals I felt: Proud and pleased with the growth of the work but busy. Really, really busy. Stressed and frazzled on some days. Barely enough time to serve clients and contribute to my community service goals.

My take-away? While I’m proud of my accomplishments and want to accomplish more in 2019, I intend to approach it differently so that I create more space in the day to be creative and to devote some time to other interests, too.

Now it’s your turn. Go ahead….list your accomplishments. There’s a space here.

My accomplishments at work are:

How did I feel as I worked toward these goals? (Relaxed, exhilarated, inspired, peaceful, realistic, frantic, proud)

My accomplishments in my personal life are:

How did I feel as I worked toward these goals?

My accomplishments for my community are:

How did I feel as I worked toward these goals?

My accomplishments in my spiritual life are:

How did I feel as I worked toward these goals?

What did you discover? Are you over-extending in some areas at the expense of others? Is the price you pay for accomplishment too high? Infotuition teaches that it’s just as important to consider how you achieve your goals as what you achieve.

With this in mind, write your 2019 goals together with how you’d like to feel along the way (relaxed, exhilarated, inspired, peaceful, realistic, proud or rested). Let that clarity color the approach you take to your goals and guide the atmosphere with which you surround yourself. Now that’s infotuition!

Photo Copyright : Jan Hruby



You drive along admiring the fall colors when suddenly the check engine light comes on in your car. What does that mean? For most of us, the check engine light indicates that something is wrong inside the car. We best find out what it is.

You have an internal check engine light. It’s the nagging feeling you get when something isn’t sitting right. Do you diagnose your nagging feeling just as you diagnose your car?

You tape over it. At a recent keynote address, I asked the audience what they do when their car’s check engine light comes on.  A woman on the front row said, “I tape over it!”  When your check engine light comes on, do you tape over it, ignore or discount it? As with your car, ignoring it is unlikely to be a sound solution. The source of the nagging feeling is still there.

Much in our culture reinforces the misguided notion that feelings lack validity or are not worthy of notice. We may be embarrassed by them or simply not have the skill to notice. The nagging feeling typically arises because the situation is incongruent with your brain’s expectation. Maybe the situation (or person) flies in the face of your value system. That always sets off the check engine light. Maybe the person has a communication or work style approach that radically differs from yours and it feels uncomfortable.  Maybe your experience leads you to see the situation differently from your colleagues.

Incongruence increases stress, causes you to over-react, make a poor decision or create an upset with a colleague.  You can prevent those unhealthy outcomes if, like in your car, you notice it.

Notice the check engine light. You notice the light in your car and you know that you need to do something … soon. Unfortunately, many of us power through the day without attending to the emotion that bubbles under the surface. We shove it aside.

It’s time that we relearn how to notice the nagging feeling in the gut. The feeling brings information and wisdom to your situation. The best way to notice the feeling is to practice naming it. “I feel annoyed by that discussion.” “My boss frustrates me!” “Something doesn’t feel right about this decision.”

Give voice to the gut feeling. It’s like acknowledging the check engine light and the need to attend to your car. You need to attend to your inner wisdom.

Understand the problem. The best action is to dive under the hood of the car (for real or with a mechanic) to find the source of the alert. Maybe it’s an indication of a big problem or maybe it’s an easy fix. It’s the same for you. The wisest of us notices the check engine light and dives under the hood to understand the nagging feeling.

What is incongruent for you? Does their behavior fly in the face of your values? Does the decision you face challenge your assumptions? Does the person conduct their work differently from you? These are examples of incongruence in the brain. Your experience doesn’t square up with your expectations. When that happens, the check engine light goes off. It’s your job to understand why and decide if the reason is valid.

Your car may break down if you ignore the check engine light. Your health, life and leadership depend on noticing and resolving the nagging feeling inside. What’s your check engine light telling you?

Photo: Bwylezich



attentionAs Thanksgiving approaches in a couple of weeks, let’s turn it upside down. Rather than giving thanks, let’s give those around us something to be thankful for.  Here’s the perfect gift – your attention.

A friend recently said to me, “The most precious gift you can give someone is your attention.” That idea stuck.  Today’s world is cluttered with demanding gadgets that insistently beep and buzz until attended to; pop-ups that relentlessly hog the screen and bully their way into the forefront.  Attention becomes a precious bit of energy that we pilfer away carelessly.

Here are three actions you can take to give others that precious gift of your attention.

  1. Your next meeting. In the next meeting you participate in or lead, walk in the door, sit down and put your phone conspicuously on the table face down and don’t touch it until you leave. As conversation unfolds, look each person in the eye and listen. Notice their reaction and the quality of the relationship that is generated by the simpe giving of your attention.
  2. Visitors in your office. You are knee-deep in emails when your co-worker walks in the door. Stop typing; remove your hands from the keyboard and turn to face your guest. For the next few minutes, give them your full attention. Perhaps you’ll find that you reach resolution quicker or you generate more interesting ideas together or, maybe, the person feels heard. That last one is indeed a precious gift.
  3. The others. This last one is my personal favorite.  As you go about your day, notice all the small interactions you have with the other people like Tim, the person taking your order at Panera; Joyce, the checker at the grocery store; or Juanita, the bank teller (all people I encountered today). Maybe for you it’s Julio who makes your coffee or Susie at the dry cleaners. Whoever it is, for each of them, pause, make eye contact, hold eye contact, smile and engage in momentary conversation. The exchange may not last a minute and yet it matters. These are people accustomed to being overlooked.  When you instead give attention to them, notice how they brighten–and all it cost you was a moment of attention.

And for me, I would like to thank you for reading. Through reading, you give me the gift of your attention. For that, I am most grateful. I hope you go and share the gift of your attention with others.



gut feelingMeet my brother-in-law, Jerry Trimble. Jerry has been flying helicopters his entire life.  His mom has a photo of him as a two-year-old sitting in a helicopter reaching for the stick. (He’s adorable. He would hate me saying that which makes it even more fun.) He’s flown all sizes of helicopters – big ones (like those that carry fire suppressant), middle-sized ones (like those for Life Flight) and small ones (for teaching a beginner). Today, he and my sister (who is also a pilot) run a helicopter flight business in Oregon. I had the opportunity to fly with Jerry last week. Flying is second nature to Jerry. He could fly in his sleep.  But, he doesn’t.  Instead, he walked through a lengthy checklist of startup procedures…twice. He knows that safety is no time to trust his gut or rely on habit.

Are you trusting your gut when you shouldn’t be?  Before we pursue that, let’s briefly look at your brain. Your brain is an amazing processor that takes in reams of information from your eyes, ears, nose, and touch. It quickly makes sense of it all because it takes shortcuts to simplify processing. Brain shortcuts come from repetitious activity that we know as a habit. The brain skips the energy-intensive processing and defaults to habit. That’s great…until it isn’t.

Do you know, as Jerry knows, when you can trust your gut and when you shouldn’t?

Safety: When your work involves safety procedures or you supervise people for whom safety is a concern. They and you need to take care that you don’t default to habit. Of course, you want to develop habits that are grounded in safety but don’t lose sight of the need to be conscious and respectful of safety. Like Jerry’s checklist, frequent reminders are key.

People: Have you ever met someone who you immediately liked? Or disliked? That’s because your brain took a shortcut. If it noted something familiar, it registers as “like.” If it picked up on something contrary to your values or preferences it registers “dislike.” Your brain quickly reached a conclusion – and it could be wrong. Watch for quick, gut judgments in personnel decisions. Your brain is taking a shortcut that may be more about your history than about the person in front of you. Your skill is to recognize and manage the brain shortcuts that create judgments.

Quick Decisions: Particularly for experienced managers who have “been there, done that,” you decide quickly based on history. Without realizing it, you think, “Yeah, I’ve seen this before.” But, maybe you have or maybe not. For decisions with far-reaching implications, it’s worth double checking the quick conclusion of your brain. Is the current situation really like the past? What are the differences? Is the future on the same trajectory as the past? Can you really rely on the brain shortcut (your experience)? Chances are, there are many situations where your experience can be relied upon for quick decisions, but if your industry or organization is changing rapidly, big decisions merit a second look.

I’m the first one to say that the gut brings valuable information to the table, and you need to skill to use it effectively. Consider your day. When is it okay to go with your gut for a quick reaction? When are you in situations where your brain shortcuts could lead you astray? Start now to develop the skill to tell the difference.

Here is a great article from ConsciousEd called Intuition and How to Trust Your Gut.

Do you have an example of when you challenged your gut reaction and were glad you did?

Copyright : Marek Uliasz



Taking the temperature of the room doesn’t mean too hot or too cold. It means taking the emotional temperature of the people in the room. Taking the emotional temperature gives you an edge to enhance productivity. Here’s an example.

It was an exhausting meeting, but we knew it would be exhausting. The strategic planning discussion would set the future direction and tone for the organization.

We started by taking the temperature in the room. “Before we begin, let’s check in. How do you feel as we start this strategic discussion?” Around the room we heard: “optimistic, guarded, enthusiastic, hopeful, anxious”.

We took the emotional temperature again at the end of the meeting. “As we wrap up the discussion, how do you feel about where our strategic discussion ended?” This time… “Satisfied, overwhelmed, encouraged, worried, energized.”

How is it helpful to take the emotional temperature?

All meetings and conversations have an emotional component. It’s the way we are designed as humans. We feel first and think second. The emotional state of the people in the room impacts the nature of their participation, the outcome of the discussion and future productivity. You can either gain intelligence about the emotional state in the room or find out about it (or not) outside of the room from hallway conversations. It’s best to know it in the moment so that you can manage more effectively. When possible, we like to be as dynamic and interesting as we can be when leading meetings, and I know many leaders that choose to make use of tools such as a Writey stickon whiteboard for their meetings. However, depending on the emotional state of everybody involved in the meeting, this is not always possible.

In a well-planned meeting, you thought through the purpose, you have an agenda and you manage the discussion. But, all meetings and conversations have an emotional undertone which we often overlook. Just as you would get facts on the table, it’s best to get emotional content on the table, too. It’s not hard to do. The simple question that I offered in my strategic planning meeting does the trick. Stating the emotional state of mind up front and at the end serves two functions.

For individuals. The emotional state of each participant is at work under the surface. That emotion colors participants’ decision-making, engagement level and their motivation during and after the discussion. When you ask them to voice their emotional state it brings the emotion into focus for them. When they state it out loud, it validates the feeling and lessens the impact. (Research shows that validation of feeling reduces the brain’s threat response.)

For leaders. As the meeting leader, when you take the emotional temperature at the beginning of a meeting, you gain critical information that allows you to more adeptly manage the meeting. When I hear someone say “enthusiastic,” I know to engage them so that their enthusiasm impacts others. When I hear, “concern,” I know to listen closely to understand more. At the end of the meeting, if I still hear “concern” or “overwhelm,” I know to follow up and learn more so that we are more likely to attain the objective.

Try taking the temperature before and after your next important meeting. Notice the additional information it gives you to more effectively manage the meeting. It’s a simple and powerful technique. Let me know how it goes!

Photo by Vladischern



sculptureThe chances are good that you haven’t heard of Gustav Vigeland. But his single-minded focus on one concept has much to teach us. He is the Norwegian sculptor whose life’s work is on view in Vigeland Park in Oslo.  He created hundreds of bronze and stone figures depicting the range of human emotion. As impressive as the quality of his work is, it’s the scale that overwhelms. Happy, jubilant, angry, sad, resigned, confused, enraged, nurturing, and fun people tumble, jump, heave, race, love and care for each other along a bridge and up the hill to his signature obelisk. His work is the biggest attraction in Oslo. It is a testament to a single-minded focus on his passion throughout his life.

What if each of us accomplished our passion with a single-minded focus? What would it take to do that? Here’s what I learned from Gustav.

Have a focus. Some may view Gustav’s life’s work as sculpting, but I see it as communicating humanness. What is yours? It may not show up as a physical thing like sculpting. It may be a concept, a belief, a principle. What do you believe in? What do you care about? What values do you epitomize? What has changed your life? Is it your integrity; your honesty; your fairness; your belief in the power of innovation; your commitment to urban design for quality of life; your passion for walkable communities? For example, for me, the concept of infotuition was a game changer. Infotuition encapsulated the moment when I learned that to lead and live requires more than logic. I needed to think and feel; to integrate information and intuition. Today I bring infotuition to decision-making, motivation and teamwork. What is your passion?

Express it. Whatever your passion, how do you express it in your work and leadership? You can’t impact the world or influence others if you keep your inspiration to yourself. Gustav chose to communicate his passion for human emotion through sculpture. For those of us communicating a concept, the more ways to communicate, the better. At Vigeland Park, one person was captivated by the angry baby; another by the entwined lovers; others had to look away from the enraged man. The emotion hit home differently for different people. In your case, do you talk to your staff about what you believe? Do you make decisions in alignment with your belief? Do you write and speak on your concept? Whatever it is for you, don’t keep it a secret.

Maintain the focus. Vigeland Park is striking due to the scale of the work. For decades, Gustav pursued his passion. The result was hundreds of emotional sculptures. He was persistent, and so must you be.  Your staff, clients, colleagues require time to notice and internalize your belief, concept or passion. You’ll think it’s obvious sooner than anyone else. You’ll see your concept at work when no one else does. Settle in. This takes time and repetition. The impact starts in time.

Gustav made an impact. I intend to make an impact because infotuition is a concept whose time has come. What’s your concept? Where do you wish to leave a mark? Don’t wait. Get started!

Photo credit: TripAdvisor



There were thirteen of us and an unknown number of them. We, leaders of a technology company, were standing in a dark field surrounded by the rugged mountains of Sedona. We held night vision goggles and laser pointers that reached ten miles. They were the inhabitants of the UFOs for which we were searching. Yes, we were on a UFO-watching tour. Never did I or any of us expect to be searching for UFOs. It definitely challenged our assumptions.

You may not have UFOs in your office, but insightful leaders know the importance of challenging assumptions. First, let’s do a reality check.  You must make assumptions. Assumptions are your brain’s shortcuts that help it manage the number of decisions you make in a day. However, you must also recognize when assumptions constrict your choices and constrain innovation.

In my experience, most people are unaware of their assumptions and the limitations assumptions create. Foster awareness by shining a light on assumptions. When people realize they made an assumption it either 1) opens their eyes to new opportunities or 2) allows the assumption to be revisited and updated. Either way, innovation is facilitated.

As an insightful leader train yourself to listen for assumptions. They may be the culprit during an impasse or a roadblock. Here are a few assumptions that get in the way of progress.

Assume the future is like the past. In rapidly changing environments, assumptions about markets, people, customers, and partners may no longer be valid. For example, in my field of transportation, we often assume that everyone wants to drive their personal car, but trends show fewer driver’s licenses and more use of other transportation options. What is changing in your industry that requires you to challenge long-held assumptions?

Assume that resources are finite. In my early days as a manager at the U.S. Department of Transportation, we executed work with only our staff.  The staff asserted that the update to a key manual would take years. “What assumptions go into that estimate?” we asked. They assumed that the work was done only with the current staff.  Once we surfaced the assumption we opened new avenues for execution (and hired consultant support).  What assumptions are your staff making that limit their options for execution?

Assume that past decisions are still relevant. We cling to old decisions sometimes to our detriment. I work with a leader who is reluctant to share information with staff. When a new leader took over, that reluctance continued until the assumption was challenged. With new leadership, say, “It sounds like that previous decision is limiting our options and we assume that it can’t be changed. What would it take to reevaluate the original decision?”

Assume that it can’t be done or it’s too hard. As a leader in government, I was often told that it was too hard to fire underperforming staff. But when we examined that assumption we learned that, while not easy, it was certainly doable. What does your staff believe is too hard and what assumptions are in play?

Assume that past impressions are relevant today. “We know what our client wants.” Are you sure? Clients, bosses, and boards change and with that change comes new attitudes.  Ask, “Let’s examine the assumptions. When was the last time we studied client preferences?” Or, “We have a new board now, let’s not assume that they have the same goals as the previous board.”

None of us expected to be searching for UFOs but there we stood, scanning the night sky looking for something none of us believed in. We were forced to confront our assumptions particularly when we saw UFOs! We traced the UFOs with our lasers as they zig-zagged across the night sky. We pointed excitedly at bright white lights on inaccessible mountain tops that appeared, brightened and dimmed, disappeared and reappeared.  We have no explanation, nor do we have our previous assumptions.

What assumptions hold you back?

Copyright: realillusion / 123RF Stock Photo



trophyThe trophy case stood in the middle of the building. It covered an entire wall. Walking through the Miles River Yacht Club, the sun reflected off the polished silver cups, chalices, and bowls. Some of the most highly sought trophies could have held a basketball. I stood in front of the case and marveled. I’d just witnessed historic log canoe races. The boats were beautiful, the crews were skilled, and the decades-old trophies were huge.

What, I pondered, causes us as humans to create an object (a big, shiny object) to signify accomplishment? Givers of trophies learned centuries ago what neuroscientists can now see. Trophies of any sort cause the brain to feel appreciated, connected and seen. You probably don’t have a trophy case at your office. And, you don’t need one as long as your employees feel rewarded for outstanding work.

How do you make employees feel like they just won the big trophy? There are more ways than you may think. Anything that makes them feel appreciated, connected and seen is an intrinsic trophy. An intrinsic trophy connects with the heart and feels good. Here are five examples to get you started.

1.       Take her to lunch or coffee. Never underestimate that power of being seen with the boss. Go into the lunch or coffee with an attitude of curiosity. What can you learn from this person? What can she teach you? Tell her what you learned and watch her glow with pride.

2.       Call him out in front of colleagues. Make it specific. Describe what he did to merit the mention so that he understands that you really know his contribution. Tie his work to an organizational initiative, goal or value.

3.       Listen to her ideas. Really listen. Repeat back what you hear to ensure that you truly understand. Repeating the idea forces you to pay attention. To be heard is to be seen.

4.       Implement his idea and give him credit. There is no greater compliment you can give than to implement his idea. Be clear about the source of the idea and give credit where credit is due.

5.       Donate to her favorite charity in her name. Not only is this a nice thing to do but you may be surprised by the choice of charity. The charity she selects may provide new insight into interests and life experiences

Notice that each of these intrinsic “trophies” creates good feelings because the rewarded person feels appreciated, connected and seen. You and your staff are thinking, feeling beings. The insightful leader is wise enough to leverage feelings to support, encourage and reward staff. It doesn’t have to be a punch-bowl-sized, silver chalice (although that could work, too!). Create your own intrinsic trophy case by consistently recognizing prize-winning behavior.

What creative techniques have you used to reward staff and make them feel appreciated, connected and seen?

Photo Credit: Spinsheet.com



It was supposed to be an easy cruise. That’s what they told me.  The  47’ Morris sailboat, sailed the Newport to Bermuda race and finished second in her class. We were part of the crew sailing her back to Newport.  And, it was my first sailing trip. To say that the trip didn’t go as planned is an understatement if there ever was one. We made it back safe and sound because of the quality of the boat and the experience of the crew – except for me. When we left I still didn’t know a jib from a halyard or port from starboard.

The trip, expected to be a little more than three days, took five due to adverse weather. The only thing calm was the crew. The seas were rough almost from the start and became even rougher when we crossed the Gulf Stream. The evening we hit the Gulf Stream, we encountered three 50-knot squalls in quick succession with 10’ to 12’ seas. Due to the rough weather, the boat had a series of issues. The auto pilot stopped working on day one, the engine stopped on day two, during the storm the reef line on the mainsail broke, the halyard on the jib broke, the furler jammed, the tack of the spinnaker let go and, later, the spinnaker artfully wrapped itself around the forestay. During the worst of the storm, lines fell into the water and promptly wound themselves around the propeller shaft. I’m told that none of this is unusual but to have them all happen on one voyage was remarkable. By the time we arrived in Newport, everything I brought to wear was wet. The quick-dry fabric never dried.  Collectively, we smelled like a 50’ wet tennis shoe. Are we having fun yet?

As I lay in the narrow bunk, heeled 30 degrees, I listening to the storm tear at the boat and sails. And, I listened to the crew tackle each adversity calmly, collaboratively, decisively and transparently. Do you do the same when adversity hits your organization?

Calm. It was one problem after another in quick succession in rough weather. It would have been unnerving except for the calm of the captain. With each calamity, he talked to the crew – no raised voice, panic, of exasperation. The intensity of the situation stood in clear contrast to his calm demeanor.  As an insightful leader, how do you manage stress and outwardly demonstrate calm?

Collaborate. When a problem was solved, something else broke. Each time, the captain collaborated with the crew. What happened? What are the pros/cons of each option? This was no dictatorship. Neither was it a democracy. It was informed leadership. How do you collaborate under stress to capture and objectively weigh all options? Our captain based his decisions on crew input. Do you truly listen to others?

Decisive. The conversations between the captain and crew were quick, succinct and decisive. The captain listened, made a decision, and that was that. Other ideas were dropped, and action was taken. Are your decisions crisp, clear and strong? Once you decide, don’t waiver. There’s time later to evaluate and adjust. For now, give staff clear directions to follow.

Transparent. We were in a tough spot. Some of us were not experienced sailors and the situation was a wee bit unnerving (to say the least). It would have been easy for the captain to sugar-coat our predicament under the pretense of not alarming us.  Instead, he was honest and transparent. In a matter-of-fact manner, he shared the realities of each situation and decision. The transparency was reassuring and created trust. Are you being transparent with your staff about difficult situations? Yes, some topics can’t be discussed openly, and it is not constructive to publicly debate every option.  However, once a decision is made, it is helpful to share the decision, the rationale behind the decision and the implications. People understand that not everything goes as expected, but people don’t like to be in the dark. That creates suspicion and erodes trust. Transparency does the opposite.

I confess that I’m not ready for another cruise like this one, but I’m grateful for the crew and for the lessons: be calm, collaborate, be decisive and transparent.

Share an experience that you’ve had that taught you a lesson.